A friend wrote :
When we learn to stop identifying completely with “thought” and “emotion” ..that is to say “ego” ..that is the “state ” to “be” . .. then that is the “Truth” … the Truth is inseparable from who you are.
It makes me wonder does ego always account for unhappiness? Sometimes, a human is faced with certain circumstances, events and obstacles, that shake our very existence . These events don’t really have to do with ego, but deep sorrow over events which are just out of your control. Isn’t it human to go down and low in those times, as long as you are focused enough to bounce back with zeal and vigor?
I have gone in a deep pit of emotions recently and i will not say that i am in the mood to sieze the happiness. I just know that it is essential to go through these low moments and infact embrace the melancholy of this dark pit in order to be happy and to learn to be happy again.
We have to go through the depression and the sadness to be able to deal with it- to be ready for happiness- because if you do not go through the pain and experience it, your so called happiness may be a facade and demons will sooner or later catch up with you.
Happiness indeed is a state of mind. And if you choose to be happy, you can be. For some that is easy, and for some, it’s a struggle…
We all have different life issues so obviously our point of views will differ. It’s just that some of us are going through the journey and some are closer to the destination.
In my little exposure to the world, i have noticed that some ( as opposed to all ) people find it really hard to deal with setbacks and tragedies that suck the life out of the best of us. People prefer to take sleeping pills or go out partying and drinking, and sometimes just avoid thinking about the problem itself.
My question is, WHO DOES NOT WANT TO BE HAPPY?
Most people do, right? But does this mean that in the quest to be happy, you actually lose sight of the fact that life is about the ups and downs and the ying and the yang?
Life cannot be picture perfect all the time. So yes, even though i like to think of myself as a very non complicated person, but i would prefer to deal with the sadness too. It teaches you a lot. It makes you grow. It makes you understand. It makes you more open to other people’s plight. For me, life should be embraced with entirety- the sadness and happiness of it all.
Then, there is the question as to whether happiness really has to be linked to other people?
Well, ideally, it should not be, right? I mean, most people have really reached that point in life where they are emotionally independent, or well, at least some people like to say that. But, are they?
I do think that despite all that jazz and shmaz and all the nice perfect things people say, we all ( and this is just my opinion) like to be cared for.
If someone gives me flowers, it would make me super happy. If i buy flowers for myself, that would make me happy too, but if someone else did, it would make me feel extra special.
If someone gave me a birthday surprise, i would be pleasantly happy . errm… yes, i can buy my own cake and blow my own candle and call all my friends to my place, but, nothing beats the happiness when you know people care and have made an effort for you.
I am not scared to admit all this. I am not a super woman. I have emotional needs and maybe once in a year, it wouldn’t hurt to make me feel that maybe, i am cared for. :p
So no, i do not think there is something as Happily Ever After. But there is definitely, those little moments of happiness that you get from the vaguest, tiniest and the most unusual of places and events, that really make life blissful sometimes.