Super Memory, Super Success


Some people work hard, juggle a lot of hats and have a lot of information stored in their brilliant brains. Unlike me.

It’s so interesting to see how these people process information though. The pause, the expression as if you are slowly untangling the web of interlinked thoughts and picking out the one you need. the slow yet brilliant speech then deciphering that thread of thought in a coherent sentence. slight stammer but when delivered, brilliant.

one of the secrets to professional success is a super memory- which i don’t have. 

 

*sigh*

Insecurity at the workplace


An observation after 5 years of work in different companies and hearing colleagues cribbing in various departments having varying roles:

 

If a boss “accepts” the “track/redline” changes a subordinate made in a document before sending it out across, he/she is insecure and probably not very confident of his/her skills. Point is – it leads to de-motivation and angst in the subordinate.

 

Strangely, male bosses do the above considerably less than women.

 

Wonder why is that?

http://www.google.co.uk/imgres?q=insecure+boss&num=10&hl=en&biw=1024&bih=631&tbm=isch&tbnid=hU8Dp_Wo14SlxM:&imgrefurl=http://www.washingtonpost.com/national/on-leadership/your-mean-boss-could-be-insecure/2012/07/12/gJQAiIZufW_story.html&docid=X0Z2YO8CqN5v-M&imgurl=http://www.washingtonpost.com/rf/image_404h/2010-2019/WashingtonPost/2012/07/12/National-Enterprise/Images/angryboss.jpg&w=595&h=404&ei=ta9SUJbfCsnKtAaFi4D4BA&zoom=1&iact=rc&dur=495&sig=109976768083626151688&page=1&tbnh=135&tbnw=173&start=0&ndsp=15&ved=1t:429,r:11,s:0,i:108&tx=95&ty=95

Wife and Password


One of my colleagues or rather all of my immediate colleagues sometimes require help when it comes to the internet. Today there was a ‘ Can’t remember my password’ day. So well, I guided my colleague to the “Can’t access account” link, from where we moved onto “resetting the password” and sending the link to re-setting the password to another e-mail address. Now, once upon a time, the colleague decided to punch in his wife’s email address as an alternate email address, which meant that the link to re-set his mail account’s password would go into his wife’s email account.

“Umm… I think I’ll wait a week. My wife is out of town. I think I’ll reset it when she comes back.”
” Can you undo everything?”

Me, amused answer back: “That’s ok! I did not send the request, so there is nothing to be un-done here.”

“Oh good”, the colleague answers with visible relief on his face.

I could not resist and said: “Never make the mistake of sharing your password with your wife?”

The answer: “oh yes!”.

Need I say more?

Hmmm…..

Good Food. ;)


You know there is something wrong with the spell check, your fingers or your tummy when you want to write:

 “ We bring with us Good News”.

But you instead type,

 “ We bring with us good food”

 and click send. :p

 Image


 

Blogger needs your help


Today i reach out to all my wonderful readers. This female janitor/maid in our office is keen to learn how to read and write in order to be able to help her young children study. Her children are currently enrolled in school and she feels that there is only so much assistance she can give to her children with respect to their education.

 

She wants to learn for her children. She wants to learn how to read and write and is willing to enroll in a school and take lessons.

 

Do any of you know of any effective adult literacy programmes in the city of Karachi?  Do you know of any non governmental organizations or schools that i can reach out for in this regard?

 

Your help would be dearly appreciated. God Bless.

 

 

First work blooper of the Year


Sending an official letter to important folks dated January 4th 2011 when it is infact January 4th 2012. *Sigh* Epic Fail.


Work Blooper


After years of wanting to take a make up class so i too can somehow metamorph my plain jane face into something more umm…. what’s the word, glamorous, i decided to enroll into a “make-up artistry” class. Yes, that’s what it is called.

The next thing i did was to send an email to all the girls i know who may be interested in joining as well. And that is where i faltered. In my excitement, i negligently sent the email to a colleague with whom i usually correspond on a formal and official basis.

Within a few minutes, i received a reply from the same colleague stating the following:

” I hope this mail was not meant for me.”

Oh my God!

By the way did i tell you folks, that the colleague is a “male”,

*Hides crimson face in hands and suppresses embarrassed giggles. *

‘Of Elevators and People.


Oh, where should I start from? So much to say. I wish I had some grand, exciting theory to talk about, which would stimulate brain cells, but no, here I am talking about (Say it!)… Yes, Elevators and PEEEPUL. Every elevator ride, just as every auto rickshaw ride is an experience, although thankfully the former (if lucky) only lasts a few minutes.

Here are some of the issues , you may face or things you may observe in the elevator:

1- Queuing Up

Every day at work, I need to go up six (6) floors in my office building to reach my workstation. The first step to get inside the elevator is to stand in the ever long queue, which may become so long that we’ll start queuing at the entrance of the building some day. I am one of those women who believe in equality in such a way that I feel men should not be discriminated against as well. So, i am not one of those ladies who disregard the men queuing up and confidently walk right at the start of the queue, waiting for the elevator to open and strut right in. Come on, that is unfair. I choose to queue up like the men and patiently wait for my turn.

Although a few days back, an old man told me very respectfully, “Agar aap aagay jaa ker khari naheen hoteen, tou ye aap ki hamaqat hei.” i.e. if you don’t walk right at the start of the queue, disregarding the queue like other women, then it is my folly. Thankfully, i am not the only female who chooses to stand in queue, so oh well, get used to women who don’t behave like they need help all the time (just sometimes. ;))

Anyways, the elevator experience gets more enriching. Wait until you get inside it.

2- The Stare Psychology

Once inside, some poor depraved soul, may start staring intently at my face. And, the only reason I notice him, is because females have a very strong six sense. They know when someone is looking at them, without the need of looking at the person. The staring man doesn’t blink and he doesn’t feel embarrassed when he realises that you know he is staring at you. He just stares, stares and stares, until either you get off the elevator or he does. His staring has absolutely nothing to do with whether you are pretty, unpretty, stylishly dressed, modestly dressed, in a burqa, enveiled , wearing a skirt or in pants. This is the way he gets kicks. This is your average depraved, sick male (not generalizing.). This is his vengeance towards the pretty much sad life he has. I am usually tempted to make it sadder, by poking his eyes with my fingers or spraying some pepper spray so deep in his eyes that he forever keeps his gaze low. I think his family’s prayers are the only thing saving him, because as far as I’m concerned, I’m this close to snapping.

| “Tell the believing men to lower their gaze and be modest. That is purer for them. Lo! Allah is Aware of what they do. And tell the believing women to lower their gaze and be modest.” (An-Nur: 30-31)- The Holy Quran |

3-Body Odour, Burps and the like

Repulsive. Nothing more, nothing less. Please do not burp audibly in the elevator. It’s sick. I have stopped myself from wailing; “euuuuuuuuuuuuuu”, many times. Don’t eat so much that your tummy explodes and asks for mercy. I know it was lunch time and i know, you feel hungry, but why oh why, make puddles of cholesterol and chutneys of spices in your stomach and then torture, everybody in the elevator with sounds and smells, we can all do without.

|On the authority of Al-Miqdaam ibn Maadiy-Karib who said: I heard the Messenger of Allah saying: “No human ever filled a vessel worse than the stomach. Sufficient for any son of Adam are some morsels to keep his back straight. But if it must be, then one third for his food, one third for his drink and one third for his breath.”- Ahmad, At-Tirmidhi, An-Nasaa’I, Ibn Majah – Hadith sahih. |

Then there are those people who forget to take a shower. Not many. But some. Do not try camouflaging the odour with perfume, you are making it worse. You are activating my sinus. You are a walking virus. Just shower! I would like to give a disclaimer to the peons because maybe, just maybe, they have water issues at home, but the rest,  you have NO excuse.

|”….For God loves those who turn to Him constantly and He loves those who keep themselves pure and clean. (The Noble Quran, 2:222)”|

|Narrated Abu Musa: “Allah’s Apostle said, ‘The example of a good companion (who sits with you) in comparison with a bad one,is I like that of the musk seller and the blacksmith’s bellows (or furnace); from the first you would either buy musk or enjoy its good smell while the bellows would either burn your clothes or your house, or you get a bad nasty smell thereof.’ (Translation of Sahih Bukhari, Sales and Trade, Volume 3, Book 34, Number 314) |

4- The Elevator Singers

Oh yes, they exist. There is a certain lady, who looks educated, well to do and seems to belong to a respectable family, but she has this insane habit of humming when in the lift.  She will take her blackberry out, skim through the emails and hum while at it. And all this happens, when the elevator is overcrowded inside. I still have not been able to figure out, why she does that. Is this a mere habit? Hmm… Strange.

Then, there is that man, who starts humming a song, out of tune, when it’s just you, him and the elevator operator inside. Does he do that to get a woman’s attention? He needs some counseling. The last time it happened, i almost blurted out: “Can you sing louder so the dogs can hear you? They have been searching for their lost puppy since a long time. I think you’re the one. You howl just right.”

5- The Ringtones

I have heard qawallis, political parties’ jingles, the adhaan, the late Benazir’s voice, birds chirping, trance music, ghazals, sad songs and romantic tunes. You name it.

6- The Talkers

Some folks like to talk in the elevator. They will talk about the political issues, remark on the sounds coming from the elevator’s pulleys and gossip a bit. There are also those who like to throw a wisecrack, inevitably making most of us  smile or try to stifle our laughter. For folks, whose cell phones do work in elevators, they don’t wait until they get off, but chat until they reach the destination. So we all hear about their issues, their meetings, their babies, blah, blah and blah.

So you see, dear friends, an elevator ride is an experience. Still want to take the stairs? I’m with you. Who needs drama? ;)

Do you have an elevator experience you would like to share?

What to do in a Boring Meeting?


boring-meeting1If you are stuck in a really long and boring meeting full of technical jargon, start daydreaming. If it is essential to be focused, start tapping your feet on the ground soundlessly, pretending to dance- ofcourse do that only  if the table is made of teak, and your legs are invisible to everyone else. Start counting the tubelights, or listen intently to your heartbeat if you can.

:P