[Friday, 23 April, 2010 | Jumuah, Jumadi-ul-Awwal 08, 1431]


hadith01.gif Hadith image by D-jah

I think, therefore I am.

The Question:

What is the purpose of your existence? How long will your foot-prints last in the sands of time?I have an expiry date , so why should I run around to be so much to be successful in life? What will that achieve ?


My answer:

“Na tha kuchh toh Khuda tha,

kuchh na hota toh Khuda hota

Duboya Mujhko hone ne,

na hota Main toh kya hota ?”

“When there was nothing, there was God
If nothing had been, God would have been
My very being has been my downfall
If I hadn’t been, what would it have mattered?”

– Mirza Ghalib

When i look at the constellations and the never-ending universe, the small miracles in everyday life, the literal helplessness that i have in not having the knowledge of tomorrow and death itself, i give up asking the questions , and i am at peace. I know i have been created for a reason, and the reason , at least for me, is to help people, spread love and submit myself to the will of Allah. The more i complicate things, the more restless, clueless and prone to disaster i feel i am. Been through it once, and i do not fall into the same ditch again. sometimes not knowing is empowerment.

I Believe..

That just because two people argue, it doesn’t mean they don’t love each other. And just because they don’t argue, it doesn’t mean they do love each other.

I Believe…
That we don’t have to change friends if we understand that friends change.

I Believe…
That no matter how good a friend is, they’re going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that.

I Believe…
That true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance… Same goes for true love.

I Believe…
That you can do something in an instant , that will give you heartache for life.

I Believe…
That you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them.

I Believe…
That you can keep going long after you think you can’t.

I Believe…
That we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.

I Believe…
That either you control your attitude or it controls you.

I Believe…
That heroes are the people who do what has to be done , when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences.

I Believe….
That my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time.

I Believe…
That sometimes when I’m angry , I have the right to be angry, but that doesn’t give me the right to be cruel.

I Believe…
That maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you’ve had and what you’ve learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you’ve celebrated.

I Believe…
That it isn’t always enough, to be forgiven by others. Sometimes, you have to learn to forgive yourself..

I Believe…
That our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but, we are responsible for who we become.

I Believe…
That you shouldn’t be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever.

I Believe…
Two people can look at the exact same thing , and see something totally different.

I Believe…
That even when you think you have no more to give. when a friend cries out to you – you will find the strength to help.

I Believe…
That credentials on the wall , do not make you a decent human being.

I Believe…
That the people you care about most in life are taken from you too soon.

I Believe…
The happiest of people don’t necessarily have the best of everything;
They just make the most of everything they have.


| Note:  The List has not been compiled by me. I am sharing this as received. I take no credit for the pictures as well. They were saved while random browsing. |

[ Fri, 16 Apr, 2010 | Jumadi-ul-Awwal 01, 1431 ]

“You shall certainly be tried and tested in your possessions and in your personal selves and you shall certainly hear much that will grieve you, from those who received the Book before you and from those who worship many gods. But if you persevere patiently and guard against evil -then that will be a determining factor in all affairs.”

The Holy Quran. 3:186

[ If Given a choice . . . ]

Given a choice

Would you hold my hand

and tell me  i am wrong

when i think i am right ?

and admit that i am right

when you are wrong ?

Would you tell me to stop

rather than let me go ?

and let me go

when i don’t want to stop ?

Would you ground me when i am lofty

and humble me when i’m not ?

and treat me like a queen

when i am at my worst?

Would you always tell me to improve

and relaunch my life?

and would you accept me for who i am

and accept my predictability?

Would you tell me to get over it already,

wake up and smell the coffee?

and would you let me whine

and throw a tantrum when i need it?

And when i am shy

would you push me just a little..  ?

and when i am not,

would you play too?

Would you be
and not
you are not?

would you
let me
and not who
you want

If Given a Choice…

© S.Mirza

” Why my heart goes out to Sania Mirza “

“That’s not what I think every time I step on court, that an Indian never did this, an Indian never did that. I’m just there because I just want to be there. I’m happy, I’m starting something. I’m not thinking who did it or who’s gonna do it.”


I don’t think Sania Mirza, the highest ranked tennis player from India and who won the 2003 Wimbledon Championship’s Girls Double Title, really thought about whether she was the third Indian or the fourth to choose a Pakistani bloke to marry. I don’t also think that she paid close emphasis to what the Indians or Pakistanis think or what the conservative parties across the borders would possibly rant about. I don’t think that she also paid consideration to the crazy media hype which could be created with her decision to marry Shoaib Malik, a cricketer from Pakistan, who was ranked second, in the ICC ODI all-rounder rankings in June 2008.

Did she think about a certain, ‘Ayesha’, who claims that Shoaib Malik is still married to her? Did she expect skeletons to come out of Mr. Malik’s closet, just a week before the wedding? Did she expect newspaper headlines? Did she expect having to justify her to be husband’s side of the story to the media?

God No! What she may have thought though could be about love, companionship and future. She may have thought about her family’s reaction, her to be spouse’s family and the relationship that she could expect to share with him. She would have thought about the venue, the celebrations, the mehendi, the valima, her apartment in Dubai, her in-laws, her wedding cards, her dress, her tennis, his cricket and the list goes on. But all this drama, i don’t really think so.

This is nothing but traumatic and extremely stressful. Think about the amount of stress which an average bride and her family has to face just with the preparations of a wedding. They go yellow, give temper tantrums, cry for no reasons and basically become anxious felines. Now, here is one girl and her family who not only have to deal with the stress of arranging a wedding, taking care of relatives, and bidding goodbye to each other, but they have to put up with the added stress of the to be son in law’s baggage from the past. And such baggage , that the contents of which, including the dirty laundry have been put out in the public for drying and examination.

Then there is the million dollar question: Will the wedding take place or not? Oh my God! Cards have been printed, the wedding venue booked, the caterers paid, the heart and mind spent and you have the guts to question a girl, ‘Will the wedding take place take place or not?” Her heart must be crying tears of unfairness.

I put the entire blame on Shoaib Malik. Dude, whatever the truth or the lies are, whether you are a victim or whether you victimized another, that is your problem and your folly. The responsiblity of ensuring that you took care of your past, before proposing to marry another girl lies on no one but your shoulders. Marriages are based on honesty and i sure do hope that you have been dead honest with Ms. Mirza, because if that is not the case, chances of her becoming or remaining (God Forbid! ) Mrs. Malik are not very bright.

My advise to Mr.Malik not as a lawyer, but as a girl who feels for the bride to be is-  save yourself the chakars of the court and the katheri, save your self respect and especially that of Sania Mirza and her family, and just divorce the previous wife. Nip the issue in the bud. Save your face and your integrity , and let Sania Mirza enjoy her wedding and feel special. She deserves it. And if you truly love her like you say so, this is a small test and passing it should be easy shmeasy, lemon squeezy.  :)

What can i say: Mirzas’ stick together. ;)

‘Of Elevators and People.

Oh, where should I start from? So much to say. I wish I had some grand, exciting theory to talk about, which would stimulate brain cells, but no, here I am talking about (Say it!)… Yes, Elevators and PEEEPUL. Every elevator ride, just as every auto rickshaw ride is an experience, although thankfully the former (if lucky) only lasts a few minutes.

Here are some of the issues , you may face or things you may observe in the elevator:

1- Queuing Up

Every day at work, I need to go up six (6) floors in my office building to reach my workstation. The first step to get inside the elevator is to stand in the ever long queue, which may become so long that we’ll start queuing at the entrance of the building some day. I am one of those women who believe in equality in such a way that I feel men should not be discriminated against as well. So, i am not one of those ladies who disregard the men queuing up and confidently walk right at the start of the queue, waiting for the elevator to open and strut right in. Come on, that is unfair. I choose to queue up like the men and patiently wait for my turn.

Although a few days back, an old man told me very respectfully, “Agar aap aagay jaa ker khari naheen hoteen, tou ye aap ki hamaqat hei.” i.e. if you don’t walk right at the start of the queue, disregarding the queue like other women, then it is my folly. Thankfully, i am not the only female who chooses to stand in queue, so oh well, get used to women who don’t behave like they need help all the time (just sometimes. ;))

Anyways, the elevator experience gets more enriching. Wait until you get inside it.

2- The Stare Psychology

Once inside, some poor depraved soul, may start staring intently at my face. And, the only reason I notice him, is because females have a very strong six sense. They know when someone is looking at them, without the need of looking at the person. The staring man doesn’t blink and he doesn’t feel embarrassed when he realises that you know he is staring at you. He just stares, stares and stares, until either you get off the elevator or he does. His staring has absolutely nothing to do with whether you are pretty, unpretty, stylishly dressed, modestly dressed, in a burqa, enveiled , wearing a skirt or in pants. This is the way he gets kicks. This is your average depraved, sick male (not generalizing.). This is his vengeance towards the pretty much sad life he has. I am usually tempted to make it sadder, by poking his eyes with my fingers or spraying some pepper spray so deep in his eyes that he forever keeps his gaze low. I think his family’s prayers are the only thing saving him, because as far as I’m concerned, I’m this close to snapping.

| “Tell the believing men to lower their gaze and be modest. That is purer for them. Lo! Allah is Aware of what they do. And tell the believing women to lower their gaze and be modest.” (An-Nur: 30-31)- The Holy Quran |

3-Body Odour, Burps and the like

Repulsive. Nothing more, nothing less. Please do not burp audibly in the elevator. It’s sick. I have stopped myself from wailing; “euuuuuuuuuuuuuu”, many times. Don’t eat so much that your tummy explodes and asks for mercy. I know it was lunch time and i know, you feel hungry, but why oh why, make puddles of cholesterol and chutneys of spices in your stomach and then torture, everybody in the elevator with sounds and smells, we can all do without.

|On the authority of Al-Miqdaam ibn Maadiy-Karib who said: I heard the Messenger of Allah saying: “No human ever filled a vessel worse than the stomach. Sufficient for any son of Adam are some morsels to keep his back straight. But if it must be, then one third for his food, one third for his drink and one third for his breath.”- Ahmad, At-Tirmidhi, An-Nasaa’I, Ibn Majah – Hadith sahih. |

Then there are those people who forget to take a shower. Not many. But some. Do not try camouflaging the odour with perfume, you are making it worse. You are activating my sinus. You are a walking virus. Just shower! I would like to give a disclaimer to the peons because maybe, just maybe, they have water issues at home, but the rest,  you have NO excuse.

|”….For God loves those who turn to Him constantly and He loves those who keep themselves pure and clean. (The Noble Quran, 2:222)”|

|Narrated Abu Musa: “Allah’s Apostle said, ‘The example of a good companion (who sits with you) in comparison with a bad one,is I like that of the musk seller and the blacksmith’s bellows (or furnace); from the first you would either buy musk or enjoy its good smell while the bellows would either burn your clothes or your house, or you get a bad nasty smell thereof.’ (Translation of Sahih Bukhari, Sales and Trade, Volume 3, Book 34, Number 314) |

4- The Elevator Singers

Oh yes, they exist. There is a certain lady, who looks educated, well to do and seems to belong to a respectable family, but she has this insane habit of humming when in the lift.  She will take her blackberry out, skim through the emails and hum while at it. And all this happens, when the elevator is overcrowded inside. I still have not been able to figure out, why she does that. Is this a mere habit? Hmm… Strange.

Then, there is that man, who starts humming a song, out of tune, when it’s just you, him and the elevator operator inside. Does he do that to get a woman’s attention? He needs some counseling. The last time it happened, i almost blurted out: “Can you sing louder so the dogs can hear you? They have been searching for their lost puppy since a long time. I think you’re the one. You howl just right.”

5- The Ringtones

I have heard qawallis, political parties’ jingles, the adhaan, the late Benazir’s voice, birds chirping, trance music, ghazals, sad songs and romantic tunes. You name it.

6- The Talkers

Some folks like to talk in the elevator. They will talk about the political issues, remark on the sounds coming from the elevator’s pulleys and gossip a bit. There are also those who like to throw a wisecrack, inevitably making most of us  smile or try to stifle our laughter. For folks, whose cell phones do work in elevators, they don’t wait until they get off, but chat until they reach the destination. So we all hear about their issues, their meetings, their babies, blah, blah and blah.

So you see, dear friends, an elevator ride is an experience. Still want to take the stairs? I’m with you. Who needs drama? ;)

Do you have an elevator experience you would like to share?