Good Food. ;)

You know there is something wrong with the spell check, your fingers or your tummy when you want to write:

 

“ We bring with us Good News”.

 

But you instead type,

 

“ We bring with you good food”

 

and press send. :p

 

Rab dilan vich rehnda..

It is very easy to hurt someone and say sorry. It is even easier to justify your actions. It is infact easier to do things behind people’s back even with the knowledge that once they find out they will be crushed. Easy to have the audacity to justify the BIG mistakes that you have done and blame it on another. Easy to pick on something very little and make it very big when it comes to another person without looking at your own short comings.

The bigger, better person always forgives but does he/she forget and does he/she stop hurting?  Serious questions which none of us want to answer.

Life is easier to live and your conscience will be clear once you understand this verse by Bulleh Shah:

Masjid dha de, mandir dha de, dha de jo kucch dainda ,

par kisi da dil na dhanwein, Rab dilan vich rehnda.. 

( Tear down the Mosque, tear down the temple, tear down every thing in sight,

But don’t (tear down) break anyone’s heart.. because in the heart God resides.. )

Once you understand this verse, you would know that hurting or breaking the heart of even your worst enemy is a sin in itself.

سمعیہ

April 18th, 2012

When was the last time?

When was the last time someone made you feel special? That one time when your expectations were minus zero and out of no where someone perceptive enough did something incredibly thoughtful for you and blew you away? When was the last time someone made you feel that they loved you not for what you can give them, not for what they can take from you, not for what they can give you. not for your eyes, hair, lips or smile, your status or your actions. When was the last time someone told you they appreciated you because they were in love with your beautiful heart ♥. When was the last time someone made you smile?

 

- A special change -

All worries vanished. A strange lull in my storms of my heart. A calm, serene flow of life. Grasped moments so softly in the palms of my hand. I have you. You have me. And this life has been complete. AlHamdulilAllah and MashaAllah.

 

Requesting Prayers,

Mrs. Me.

:)

Betrayal

I stretch and stretch

To accommodate your expectations

I fail, I fail

Because expectations can never be met

But my expectations

I threw in a trash can centuries before

Forgiving you everyday

For every heart string plucked

It’s sad, so sad

That I will always be the one so bad

And you, you

Will always believe that you gave it all

You did give me all

Betrayal

Deceit

Hypocrisy

Traits you call mine..

although never implemented as such..

Perhaps

You only

See yourself in the mirror.

My soul is a dancer

My soul is a dancer. It likes to dance. However, to be fair I do not know the, a, b or c of dancing but dance I must. Whilst sitting at my work station and working as diligently as is possible, my shoulders are moving ever so slightly to the beat of music. It is barely noticeable but it is there.

There are times when passing through an empty corridor or alley; I actually want to break out into a bhangra over the tune of Gal Mithi Mithi Bol in my ears.  I don’t know what is the connection between empty corridors and gal mithi mithi bol, but that is the only song that beats in my ears.

Then there are those tiny atm rooms where I almost always want to do the walk like an Egyptian dance. Hehe.

Ah that takes me conferences, workshops and seminars, where I can not help myself but imagine a flash mob. Now, how would that serious bloke in a tie look if he suddenly broke out into a Michael Jackson move? And hey if you peep under the table, my feet are probably silently doing some dance step.

So yeah although I can’t do those really cool dance moves and have two left feet, but I am pretty sure my soul is a dancer. :)

In fact, i am amazed that I am a lawyer. If you judge me by my blog posts, you would probably never hire me. But who can blame you? :)

Marriage and the “D” Word.

At the onset, I am no authority on marriage and relationships. I do not even know if I have what it takes to sustain a marriage and be the perfect wife. I have always maintained that I have inherent faults which at this point in time although may be addressed but there is no guarantee that they will be fixed. Unless, someone is really nice to me…  :)

Despite the above, my expectations about marriage are fairly realistic. Fights- Frustrations- Anger- Lack of personal space-Expectations- Comparisons and related pitfalls. HOWEVER, I do firmly believe in the same vein that there is Contentment, Happiness, Companionship, Elation, Love, Comfort and Enjoyment flowing out of a marriage as well. But nothing in life is free and therefore the good parts will be yours if there is Commitment, Compromise, Sacrifice, Understanding and the Willingness to curb our big egos.

IT WILL NOT BE PERFECT, BUT IT SHOULD BE YOUR EVERYTHING IN A VERY POSITIVE WAY.

This is why I am gutted when I hear that a marriage did not work out, especially when two people look so perfect for each other. Well, that is lesson number one- appearances can be deceptive. And lesson number two, they may be perfect with each other, but they may not be perfect for each other.

Ofcourse there are valid reasons for seeking divorce- physical abuse, constant fights owing to serious incompatibility, trust issues, cheating, defrauding and the list goes on and on. But recently it appears that people are seeking divorce for the strangest of things such as misunderstandings and the illusion of having a perfect and ideal person.

To set things straight, there is a reason why misunderstandings are called misunderstandings in the first place and these should be resolved as opposed to just abandoned. When you sign on a marriage contract, you commit to a lot of things, the prominent of them being your agreement to share your entire life with that one person. That is not an easy decision. A whole lot of thought and labour goes into it. Therefore, why would you want a mis-understanding destroy everything? Why don’t two people sit across a table, alone (yes, no immediate nosy relatives please) and talk. Find out what went wrong? Address how those wrongs can be made into rights. Find a solution. I am not at all saying that there is always a solution. There may not be a solution after all, but you need to give your best shot. It may not be your fault. It may not be your decision to call it quits, but would you let ego trample over both of you in this situation? I sure do hope not. At the end of it all, even if things do not go right and two people decide to take different paths, you do have that comfort that you gave it your best shot.

Idealism and the illusion of a perfect person and a perfect relationship waiting for you with open arms is a big NO, NO. Seriously, perfection is only Allah’s attributes and we human’s just cannot match up. It will be a good idea to chuck all expectations out of the door because there is just no way your spouse can  match them. Your spouse will be lazy at times. Will sleep off. Will get angry over nothing. Will irritate you. Will create drama. Be jealous and plain crazy at times, because that is what makes one human. Believe it or not, you do the same things yourselves at times (even if you do not realize it). Accept your spouse with their flaws and your spouse will accept you with yours. Learn to look at the positive and good parts for e.g. the way he/she makes you smile, the way he/she comforts you, cooks, drives and the list goes on. (To be honest, I cannot elaborate on the list owing to utter lack of experience. ;))

Then again marriages are also breaking up because two people are being forced to marry each other when they clearly do not want to simply because of social and family pressure. You should always marry for the right reason and “marrying to meet external social pressures” is definitely not one of them. Parents should not force their offsprings to marry a person that their child has no interest it. Think of it this way, inevitably two lives are being ruined. If you do not want to be with one person, how can you be happy with them? You just can not.

I recently got to know of a marriage that is breaking down simply because the girl liked someone else and was forced to marry an individual to meet her parent’s wishes. The result- she eventually chose to file for divorce.  Without going into facts and dissecting this situation, I would draw your attention to the real problem- marrying someone not because you want to but because of social pressure. Assuming the parents knew about their daughter’s earlier love interest, they clearly should not have forced to marry another person. This is just wrong.

Forget that, the social pressure on a girl in her late twenties and thirties to get married is COLLOSAL. Every third person she meets is curious to know when she is getting married and why she is not getting married. Everybody wants to introduce her to someone. She is embarrassed routinely by folks who have her best interests at heart but make a joke of her without realizing it.

In a recent conversation during which it was clarified that a certain lady I know in her late forties and fifties is unmarried, the person on the other end enquired, “Is she a lesbian?”

So, if a woman is of marriageable age and not married, people assume all sorts of things about her and the thought never passes through their fickle brains that the reasons could be infact quite different. There infact may not be a reason at all except that despite her desire to get married, it just did not happen. Just did not. Staying single is much better than marrying out of social pressure. This applies to both genders. It is not like men in their mid thirties onwards are not subject to similar social harassment.

Marriage therefore should be taken seriously and you should get married for the “Right Reasons.” Never for someone, never to meet some one’s expectations, never because you are too old, but because you are mentally ready to spend your life with that one person.

And life goes on…

 

Forgiveness: Friday Offering

“… They should rather pardon and overlook. Would you not love Allah to forgive you? Allah is Ever-Forgiving, Most Merciful.” (Qur’an, 24:22).”

Battle of the Soups

It is clear i am a different specie when the waiter gives me a choice between  Chicken and Coriander Soup and Spinach and Egg Soup, and whilst everybody else on the table opts for the safe chicken soup, i choose Spinach and Egg. And i am not even vegetarian.

Spinach and Egg Soup

On another tangent the waiter could not pronounce, “coriander” and he was unintentionally put on the spot when someone on the table corrected him ( unintentionally of course). However, in all this unintentional mess, i saw a slight change in the waiter’s expressions. No! I will never put some one on the spot unintentionally…  at least i hope so.

Blogger needs your help

Today i reach out to all my wonderful readers. This female janitor/maid in our office is keen to learn how to read and write in order to be able to help her young children study. Her children are currently enrolled in school and she feels that there is only so much assistance she can give to her children with respect to their education.

 

She wants to learn for her children. She wants to learn how to read and write and is willing to enroll in a school and take lessons.

 

Do any of you know of any effective adult literacy programmes in the city of Karachi?  Do you know of any non governmental organizations or schools that i can reach out for in this regard?

 

Your help would be dearly appreciated. God Bless.

 

 

First work blooper of the Year

Sending an official letter to important folks dated January 4th 2011 when it is infact January 4th 2012. *Sigh* Epic Fail.

Sapphirical’s 2011 in review

The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2011 annual report for this blog. And frankly by just writing 13 posts the past year, i have proven that i am definitely at  a turtle’s speed in the world of blogging. But then you know what they say, slow and steady, wins the race. :)

But what surprised me that people came to this blog to search for “inner peace”. Boy, the disappointment,  that must have brought across. *sigh*

And folks from eight countries in North and South America, five countries in Europe, five countries in Asia and Arabia, two countries from Oceania and five countries in Africa paid me a visit too. Thank you!! Thank you!! Thank you !! This is incredibly humbling.

This year i shall strive to blog more and hope that i don’t fail. :)

Love you all. :) And thanks wordpress for making my day.

Here’s an excerpt:

The concert hall at the Syndey Opera House holds 2,700 people. This blog was viewed about 8,400 times in 2011. If it were a concert at Sydney Opera House, it would take about 3 sold-out performances for that many people to see it.

Click here to see the complete report

The New is the Old.

So this is the new year.
And i don’t feel any different.
The clanking of crystal
Explosions off in the distance.

So this is the New Year
And I have no resolutions
For self assigned penance
For problems with easy solutions.

(Death Cab for Cutie.)

A few years back on every New Years Eve, despite the fact that I was in my room and under the blanket on my bed, trying to sleep amidst the deafening celebratory gun shots ( that made me realize how a war zone would sound like) I used to be very optimistic. Brimming with energy, hope and very stupid faith and certainty, I used to declare to nobody but myself, “I am so sure the coming year will be different. Something great will happen. Something special will happen. Surely, this will be the unforgettable year of my life and I will achieve many milestones.”

So terribly naïve of me.

Fast forward a few years and now on New Years Eve, as I lie under the blanket and listen to the various types of ammunition being shot in the air, I have no feelings- nothing. – nada- zilch. To be honest, it does not even feel like it is the new year. Nothing feels different. Yes, AlhamdulilAllah I have achieved many milestones along the way, but somehow nothing in life motivates me anymore. I am after all running after nothing. Money? Fame? Success? Love? Contentment? Happiness? Do I have any of these things?  Hell NO! But still I don’t aspire for anything.

Maybe I have become a zombie- insensitivised by the bomb attacks happening every other week, frustrated by the country’s politics, tired of the meaningless social gatherings, disappointed by people to such an extent that there are no expectations at all, secretly depressed by the nothingness of life and most importantly resigned to my fate- whatever it is and whatever it may be.

But I am not unhappy. Just at peace with my self, the world and those around me.

So happy new year folks. My expectation level for this year is actually pretty low so bring it on. Love,  peace and Light as they say. <3
.-..-.
`•.•´
●/
/▌
/ \

Ps. Keep me in your prayers.

The Lazy Girl Syndrome

There is a blog post I have been meaning to write but I also want to go shopping. There are social commitments over this weekend too. But I want nothing of it. I just want to lie in bed , watch movies, eat chips, almonds and maybe some ice cream later and just sulk, sulk and sulk. Why can’t you guys understand I really don’t want to go out. :/ The only exception I would like to make is going out with immediate family. Now that makes me feel infinitely better. But for now, let me laze and sulk, please.

ps. i am so demotivated and lazy that is a sheer surprise i even wrote this.

Collective Sickness

I wanted to write about the degradation of the collective Pakistani Psyche, but then I would be generalizing. If I am a dissenting member, then I am sure others do exist or at least, I hope.

But then there are several things I do not understand:

(i)                 What kind of self-respecting Pakistani will fill up everybody’s facebook feeds with Veena Malik and her latest antics? Are, our brains slowly reducing to the size of peanuts? Is this all we can think?

(ii)               What kind of shameless Pakistani will send you texts and update their Facebook statuses and behave like twits (reference to tweeting! Sorry, I have no love lost with twitter), wishing death to the country’s President, a human.

For starters, I am not a Zardari fan. As far as I know no one is. But will I wish death to him, even if in the form of a lame joke?  No way! Not to him, not to anyone else. I feel sick at this moral decline.

And when Pakistani blogging pioneers and umm.. “social activists” like Awab Alvi ( who of course screams allegiance to Pakistan Tehreek-e-Insaaf and whom many youngsters look up to) updates his Facebook page with a below the belt joke about President Zardari and how he wishes that his doctor behaves exactly the same way that Michael Jackson’s doctor did, I almost throw up.

We need to be better than this. I beg of you, my Pakistani brethren. We really should know better. Let our psyche not deteriorate into the gutter. :/

Friday: The Best Day

Abu Hurayrah stated that Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) said:

“The best day on which the sun has risen is Friday. On it Adam was created, on it he was placed in paradise, on it he left paradise, on it he was forgiven, on it he died, and on it the final hour will take place. Every creature on the face of the earth, except Adam’s descendants, awakens on Friday on the lookout fearing the final hour until the sun rises. And there is an hour on Friday in which Allaah will grant anything a believer asks, if he is in formal prayer (salaah) during it.”

Collected by Abu Daawood (Sunan Abu Dawud, vol. 1, p. 269, no. 1041)

 

 

 

 

-

Frustration and Cell Phones

There are days when you do not care how expensive the stupid cell phone is and you just want to throw it on the floor or casually across the table to vent your frustration- even if the phone jacket is delightfully pretty.  :(

 

Work Blooper

After years of wanting to take a make up class so i too can somehow metamorph my plain jane face into something more umm…. what’s the word, glamorous, i decided to enroll into a “make-up artistry” class. Yes, that’s what it is called.

The next thing i did was to send an email to all the girls i know who may be interested in joining as well. And that is where i faltered. In my excitement, i negligently sent the email to a colleague with whom i usually correspond on a formal and official basis.

Within a few minutes, i received a reply from the same colleague stating the following:

” I hope this mail was not meant for me.”

Oh my God!

By the way did i tell you folks, that the colleague is a “male”,

*Hides crimson face in hands and suppresses embarrassed giggles. *

No Hell , No Paradise.

~ Na tarsam z’aatishe dozakh, na parvaah-e jana’n daaram
Manam shoreeda-e janaan, na khwaahum hoor-o-ghilmaan ra

 

~ Hazrat Bu Ali Shah Qalandar ~

 

I don’t fear the fires of hell, nor do I hunger after paradise
I am enraptured by my beloved, what do I care for houris and slaves in paradise?

 

~ Translation by Musab Bin Noor ~

Do you have egg and bread in the fridge?

I just had to share the niftiest egg and bread halwa recipe that I learned from my mum last night. As it happens, dad had some unpredictable guests ringing the door bell late last night and the kitchen was bare of cookies, nimko or even frozen items which could be fried and served to the guests. With my brothers away from home at that particular moment in time, we faced the predicament of what exactly to serve the guests. Me, being me suggested that we should just make some cardamom tea given the paucity of snacks in the house.

But ammi being the super mum, opened the door of the refrigerator  and took out 4 to 5 eggs and some bread. Oil was heated in a pan and the egg yolks and whites were rigorously stirred whilst at the same time, 2 fistfuls ( yep!) of sugar were dumped in. The bread was broken into many pieces and the crumbles were then added to the egg mixture. Add maybe a table spoon of milk (not more) and keep stirring until the sugar dissolves. Taste some to see if more sugar is needed. If not, throw in a few almonds, stir the halwa a bit more so the almonds too get their share of the oil massage and voila. You are done.

This takes maybe 10 minutes and best served hot with some piping hot tea.

I love it and I love my momma. :)